Ok so my issue was user error
but DJI isn't very clear in their logs either.. I should have known better though.
I got my new bird, threw firmware v1.4 on a card, updated my bird, updated my remote. Log files said success for the bird and latest firmware/same version already installed for the RC.
What really happened was the bird updated successfully while the RC did not, because RCs dont use v1.4. Log file was a bit confusing in this regard saying the firmware on the card was the same as the firmware on the RC (in reality the card had v1.4 and the RC current firmware was 1.1.9).
The fact that the RC and batteries didn't need the v1.4 update on my 1st P3P dawned on me and lo and behold i loaded up firmware 1.3.2 onto my card, updated the remote and battery (to firmware 1.3.2), and my unit has been fully operational across all 3 of my devices ever since.
So there you have it people. P3P gets v1.4, RC and batteries get v1.3.2. I think a lot of folks are having this issue and while DJI has the following message on its website I don't think its written clearly enough.
DJI website - download page: "The All-in-One firmware v1.4.0010 does not include remote controller update package. However, for the best user experience, it is recommended that the users who are using the firmware that older than v1.3.20 to update the firmware to v1.3.20 before updating the aircraft."
I purchased my 2nd P3P 1 week ago today and didn't think the firmware would be so out of date that it was 4 versions behind. Is there even a way to check what version firmware is on the bird and RC without being able to connect a mobile device?
Hope this helps some folks.